Lynn Forhilde

Lynn Forhilde
Just me enjoying the water.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Post number 3: The post thats keeps on scrolling!

Hello once again, this is the 3rd and hopefully not final edition of my journal here, and this is a big one. Big? how? you may ask, well, maybe in content, maybe in en relevant, but as I type this I'm not even so sure myself. Well, let me give a quick list of what is going to happen *reaches into the small bag attached to her hip fulling our a finely crumpled piece of paper. Also please don't run form the pic at the top, just the real me, as you can see, Amber is no where as cute as Lynn.

Ok, Well, A little while ago a great friend of mine helped me understand what was important in life, I realized that I was only trying to make others happy, and never myself, and because of that I made many life style choices only because others had wanted me to, So I'm defiantly going to get into that. I've had some real life issues with friends,I'll skip that, A lot of things have happed to Lynn, I'll speak of that, and I have had some health problems, I think I'll briefly mention that.

Ok, because this is mostly about my second life, and not my real life (I mean... why hear about the girl when you can hear about the cow) I'll keep this brief. If you remember from my first blog post (It's on this same page go look if you don't I'll wait...... ok? you read it? good, then I'll go on) I spoke of my life style, thats I was a FA, a Gainer, a SSBBW, well guess what? I was so wrong, I was only those things as thats what people wanted me to be, I had a semi rough
life (Haven't we all?) and honestly have just been a nerdy submissive girl with a extream self hate/depression. Well this led me to look for acceptance, I have always been a big girl, that's a fact, but I never liked it or wanted to be bigger until I had guys wanting me to. It was never me, it was my desire to maybe be loved, to be accepted... Well no more! I know what it was now, and I'm not going to be your sideshow anymore (And yes I do expect some of the people to read this) So as of now, Im Amber Lynn ____ (Think I would really give my last name? hehe) I'm a huge girl, who is on a path to lose the extra weight and be what I want to be, not what others want.

I have a great friend to thank for all of this, as she was the only one who looked at who I was and was able to see I was truly not happy at all, she saw the sadness when I did my best to hide it, or blame it on something else. I won't mention her name as I respect her privacy, but she is part of the DD community, so in a way I owe my life to DD, or at least my happiness. You know who you are that helped me, and I will never be able to say thank you enough.

Now, real life, that being said, I've lost like 40 pounds in the last 4 months, Which is a great start, it really shows how fast they can melt off when your actually trying not to put them on. That being said, I have been having some.... well internal medical problems, this has caused me a considerable amount of pain, and has led to a few surgeries, So if anyone was wondering what I dissapeared from DD as much as I have, or why my visits were so short... well thats why. Good news is, first surgery is done, I'm feeling much better already, and I only need one more surgery as soon as I'm healed enough for it, then Lynn will be back in Full swing.

Now as for Lynn, Well, I feel bad I have neglected her as much as I have, she needs friends as much as I do, and for me to turn my back on her when her character is nearly as stressed as mine is such a shame. Lynn has know the love of a Master, the love of Sisters, and has had both taken from her, something that even brought me sadness just from watching Lynn lose so much, She had all she desired, and lost more then she knew, all without her having any hand in it. So Lynn was looking down for a while, as as a reflection of me, the other events of my life led to a very mopey depressed Lynn for a while, both me as Lynn and as Amber would like to say sorry for that, neither me in role play or outside take well to being abandoned, and get really scared and sad when it happens. Especially when it meant a lot. I'll never be over it, just eventually scars heal, It will just take some time.

Now, with all the behind, Lynn's life is looking up, My new Mistress Cara is kind to her, Lynn does not see her Mistress nearly enough, but is thankful someone will have her regardless. Lynn really is truly devoted to those she serves, and will give all of herself to make the person happy (why does this seem like real life more and more). With her past behind her Lynn will probably take some time to get back to as cheery as she was before, but it will come, just give her time. That being said, Lynn want to take out these feeling in some way, she is still in Glint with a Fake passport, which maybe a citizen with rights could get out of, but being a Sister... well she does fear what may happen to her. Also Lynn has been talking to other girls about stirring things up, about causing a little trouble, Will Lynn ever actually get anything together, who knows? but in her mind for once she is going to be the bad girl, and no one will be able to stop her (Prove her wrong if you can.)

I guess that mostly sums everything up. once again, I very much welcome questions and comments, I more or less crave them, so leave them if you do want to know anything.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Limits... are they clear enough?

Hello again, welcome once again to the Bovine corner, I'm your favorite Cow girl named Lynn here ((And if I'm not I will match what ever they are paying you )) with another exciting post! Lots of things have been going on for Lynn in her life around glint, this post will cover her adventures and some of her creators thoughts and feeling.

First off a huge thanks to the other residents of glint, the kindness and understanding I have received in this community is a great reminder of why I enjoy to rp as much as I do. So anyone who has spoken to me so far, feel good in the fact that you truly helped me to feel welcome, and I look forward to all future rp's we may have together.

Now of course this can't all be perfect, meaning that we all have our limits and trust me, I'm the first person who will back off if I know I'm going anywhere close to something that makes people uncomfortable, but sometimes the line can get confusing. I see in may peoples profiles no bestiality, I also myself have this limit as it's something I don't find appealing, but lately I have seen it also meaning no furries. This.... confuses me, I myself don't have a problem if you don't like Furries, I will go out of my way to try to help people no matter what, even if they do hate furries, but if thats what you hate, please be specific, and don't just say bestiality, if I see only that I often assume I am allowed to rp with you, and will do my best to. I don't want to cause any problems or make you uncomfortable, so please be clear so I don't

To sum things up, this blog post isn't exactly as nice or well thought out as my last, but this pretty much throws all my current thoughts out there for you to see. I would really appreciate some of your thoughts and feelings about the whole furry subject, I am new to being a furry ((As new as my Second life account is hehe)) so I don't 100% know why people hate them so much, but I promises, at least with me I am just a normal girl...... well not normal... but I'm not some animal.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

The Dark Den, The Sisterhood, A New Country, A New Home ^_^

Hello, this is Lynn Forhilde here with my first ever post *Lynn Forhilde Looks around at the empty seats in the audience* Hey.... well I'm new, don't judge me on my first day. This post will more or less be an introduction to anyone who want to know more about me.... or those who see me and think... what the hell is that thing?!...I hope there are not too many of the last group.

I think to really say who/what I am it's important to know me as a person first, My name is Amber Lynn ____, You may ask me my last name, I may give it to you, but just like me myself, it's not for everyone. I live in Nova Scotia Canada and no I will not give a town name. I'm 24 years old, More then a little on the...plump side (Which I love, more on that later) and in many ways not a typical girl my age. I enjoy RP to a great degree, have been doing it for years but often get discouraged and will outright leave an RP community if there is a lack of mature adult nature (And no that does not mean sex, it means that the person can keep a conversation without having to go OOC to explain themselves)

Rp wise I'm extremely submissive but will often play hard to get or try to test my boundaries trying to get as much freedom as I am given, if you can force me to fall in line I may end up liking you much more. As you may know if you have seen me, I RP a Cow Girl, I mean what can I say, I really like the idea of not being an ordinary plain human and cows just happen to be an animal I feel comfy as, This does not mean I am an animal in any way, I act like any other girl, just have a few things that make me special and unique from most, if you have a problem with Furies, well I feel bad for any trouble they may have caused you in the past, and would like to try to change your mind, I don't necessarily subscribe to their culture, so I may be more open minded then most you have met, give me at try at least..... I would hate to have someone closed off to me just because of my shape.

In real life I'm not nearly as exciting, I am also submissive and every bit as shy/soft spoken as my character in Second life but sadly not a cow girl hehe. I do however take place in a fetish known as Feederism, basically I enjoy weight gain and the feeling of growing fatter, Many will stop reading there, but please for understanding purpose read on. I know many people involved in this have... of course met with less then average life spans, health problems and about every other negative aspect of medial and social society, Well yes, that is all true, but..... I am doing it healthy, I attend Bimonthly Doctors Visits to make sure I am doing it healthy, and unlike most, I do have limits, I'm not saying I wouldn't let myself ignore the limits if the right person came along, but as myself I am at about the weight I want to be so I am not currently actively gaining.

With all that out of the way, I think you may have a little better idea of who I am, I'm sorry I'm not all to specific but I wouldn't want some psycho trying to track me down to act out a rp in real life..... well... maybe I would, but I would prefer I know they are coming first. If you have any question please message me here, or in Second life (Lynn Forhilde) and I would be happy to talk to you more.